my life...so called..why issit so hard? when u fall for someone, u know you never meant to be together..you love him, he loves you, but thing is he'll never be yours? but why must you still wanna be with him? yes, he successfully steals your heart...he's fun to be with, easily talked to..communicating with, comfortable with each other...he's funny...he's a gentleman and he's a sweetheart..he is after all a good and kind man...the man who you'll know will take care of you. but there's a but...yeap.
i cried again tonite..in my heart i cried a river...tried to forget the pain by making stupid jokes but i know it is only temporarily...i cared about him so much..for what he has to endure...about his pain and sickness...about his beautiful dreams....about his hopes, about his happiness...about his well-being. i guess, i'm still with him cos i make him happy. i know. at least even temporary...i give him a flicker of hope and happiness. about taking care of him and loving him as long as i can...yeah...if i ever lose him, it's the day of my mourning...even if i ever get married to someone, for the sake of achieving my own dream...of having children...and a family i can love...until that day arrives, i'll love him...
God! how i miss being with him, but sometimes you have to sacrifice...that's why i'm crying. until when? he can repair all my miseries but he can't be mine? i can't hold on any longer...meeting him, calling him until one day i tried to hold back...but it's getting greater...for you. if you are reading this...you know how i feel...and i'm sorry we haven't made our path crossed 4-5 years ago...it's just that we lead different stories...different characters and different episodes...only that we met now, the story will be different with the hero and heroine trying hard to struggle with their cruel life. God is the Director and the scriptwriter...it depends on us to change the consequences....
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