::am i?::

Q. I ended a year relationship a month ago, and I just met someone I really like. Getting involved so soon is the last thing I expected. Mostly, I worry that I'm still on the rebound. How can I tell?

A. Dear Rebound,
Hmmm. It's always wise to keep an eye out for that ricochet effect. Sometimes, breakups feel so painful that we become irresistibly attracted to whatever will ease the sense of loss — and other people are prime targets.

Of course, there are exceptions. I know a woman who ended a 10-year relationship and within six months she met another guy, fell wildly in love and got engaged. She is now quite happily married. Was that a rebound? Maybe. Does it matter? Apparently not. All of which means that only you can judge. The safest bet is to drop the "Is it or isn't it?" approach and just assume you're carrying around some lingering baggage from your last relationship.

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You've loved, you've lost, and now you think you're in love again... but are you? One of the most common fallbacks people experience after a break up is "the rebound person" and if you find yourself head over heels for somebody new after a recent break up you are in very real danger of being on the rebound. Sure it happens sometimes that you meet Mr. or Mrs. Right quickly after your relationship ends, but this is rare. More often than not the first (and yes even the second) person that you get involved with after a break up is more a band-aid than a soulmate. How can you tell if you're still in rebound mode? How will you know when you're ready to love again? Take our "Are you on the rebound?" quiz and get a clue about where you are right now.


Your score is 40. The signs of a rebound are all there but it also appears you're ready to move on for real. This is a hard call. While you're clearly still vulnerable on many levels you've also let go of the past and want to focus on the future. This is a good thing! The best advice at this point is to follow your heart and do what feels good. Give yourself permission to be happy again and you'll find that any rebounding that is still going on will quickly lose momentum